Boyfriend had sex with another girl beside me

Dear Pastor, 

My boyfriend and I have been living together for three years. He is 23 and I am 20. When we started living together, my parents told me that I was not doing the right thing. My mother told me that I should not leave my parents’ home to go and live with a man unless we were married. My father told me that he would not discourage me from doing so if that is what I feel I should do. 

I asked my father if I could come home if the relationship with my boyfriend did not work. He said there will always be a room in the house for me, and, as a matter of fact, he would not allow anybody to occupy that room. My mother told my father that he was encouraging slackness and should be encouraging me to get married if I want to live with a man. My father told her that it was my choice.  

So I went to live with this guy and he treated me well for more than one year. Then a friend of ours had a problem with her parents and asked us if she could spend a weekend at our place. My boyfriend said that if she could not find another place, we would keep her just for the weekend (Friday to Sunday). I did not know that this girl was admiring my boyfriend. We had only one bed, so my boyfriend allowed her to sleep on it with me and he slept on the floor. I did not like that. She suggested that he should sleep on the bed. So, during the night, I went to him and told him he should come to bed, so he did. 

I fell asleep, but I woke up by the shaking of the bed. When I opened my eyes, I saw my boyfriend having sex with this girl. I thought I was dreaming, but it was real. So I asked my boyfriend “What are you doing?” and he said he was sorry, he thought that he was having sex with me. So I asked the girl, “What the ‘F’ are you doing?” She said it was my boyfriend who started to play with her while I was asleep, so she just allowed him to do it because she was turned on.   

I was so angry that I went for the knife and I told my boyfriend I was going to cut off his penis. I was really in a rage. How could he not know the difference between this girl and me? I am very slim; she has more weight than I do. He started talking more nonsense that it was dark so he really didn’t know he was on top of her. I can’t trust this man anymore. I have always trusted him, but he has destroyed my trust. I told this girl that she had to leave immediately. My boyfriend said she should stay until daylight. I have never been interested in a threesome, but that is how this thing appeared to me. Two of us as women were on the bed and this man is my lover, so why would he turn to our friend for sex?  

I would like you to know that this girl begged me like a baby not to tell anybody what she did. But the real drama is, she has now informed me that she is pregnant for my boyfriend.  

Initial Withheld.  

Dear Writer, 

I cannot encourage you to continue to see this man as your lover. He is no good. 

If he indeed impregnated this girl, he should be given the opportunity to have her totally. Both of them are shameless. You know for sure that your boyfriend is a big liar. You caught him in the very act, so he tried to lie himself out of his dilemma. He is trying to make a fool of you by telling you that he thought he was having sex with you. What a big lie.   

You should walk away from this man; go back to your father’s home. There is a room at your father’s house for you. Don’t stay with this wicked man.  

Pastor